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Can't Spell Treason Without Tea

ebook
1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available

In the tradition of Legends & Lattes, comes a cozy fantasy steeped in sapphic romance about one of the Queen's private guards and a powerful mage who want to open a bookshop and live happily ever after...if only the world would let them.
All Reyna and Kianthe want is to open a bookshop that serves tea. Worn wooden floors, plants on every table, firelight drifting between the rafters... all complemented by love and good company. Thing is, Reyna works as one of the Queen's private guards, and Kianthe is the most powerful mage in existence. Leaving their lives isn't so easy.
But after an assassin takes Reyna hostage, she decides she's thoroughly done risking her life for a self-centered queen. Meanwhile, Kianthe has been waiting for a chance to flee responsibility–all the better that her girlfriend is on board. Together, they settle in Tawney, a town nestled in the icy tundra near dragon country, and open the shop of their dreams.
What follows is a cozy tale of mishaps, mysteries, and a murderous queen throwing the realm's biggest temper tantrum. In a story brimming with hurt/comfort and quiet fireside conversations, these two women will discover just what they mean to each other... and the world.
A Macmillan Audio production from Bramble.
At the Publisher's request, this title is being sold without Digital Rights Management Software (DRM) applied.

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  • Reviews

    • Library Journal

      December 1, 2023

      A self-published hit, this cozy fantasy gets the big-publisher treatment with turquoise-sprayed edges and a 150K-copy first printing. Reyna, who is the Queen's private guard, and her girlfriend, powerful mage Kianthe, decide to leave their work behind to open a bookshop that serves tea, but mishaps, mysteries, and a murderous queen still find them. Prepub Alert.

      Copyright 2023 Library Journal

      Copyright 2023 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

    • Library Journal

      January 19, 2024

      Opening her cozy, sapphic romantasy series with a charmer, Thorne (This Gilded Abyss) builds an enchanting world in which love, community, good cheer, and high emotional intelligence win the day--except for the dragons. Reyna and Kianthe have been a couple for some time, despite pretty long odds. Reyna reigns at the top of the queen's guard, a position full of blood and peril. Kianthe is the most powerful mage across all kingdoms, a woman the queen would very much like to--acquire. The couple longs to escape, and one day they do, venturing to the far edges of the world, where dragons are raiding a town struggling to build a community. Opening a bookshop that serves tea, Reyna and Kianthe join those efforts, navigating raiders, peacemaking between the claimants to the town's hierarchy, and investigating what has so upset the dragons. All the while, both know the queen will not let their escape stand. But the pleasures of tea, books, friends, and each other are so seductive. VERDICT Like the tea they serve and the company they keep, this is a read to soothe and comfort, with sprayed book edges adding to the delight.--Neal Wyatt

      Copyright 2024 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

    • Publisher's Weekly

      February 26, 2024
      A queen’s guard and an all-powerful mage run away together in this fun and fluffy fantasy romance, originally self-published in 2022, from Thorne (The Secrets of Star Whales). When the stress of decades serving the violent and cruel Queen Tilaine becomes too much, Reyna finally follows her dream of fleeing the capital to open a tea shop with her secret girlfriend Kianthe, also known as the Arcandor, Mage of Ages. They settle in Tawney, a small but welcoming town in contested territory, and open their store, but are soon beset by visits from the Queen’s agents, mysterious dragon attacks, and tension from their own relationship anxieties. The pair must face their fears and rely on the help and wisdom of new friends to preserve the peace of their new life together. The jumbled mix of magical, historical, and contemporary worldbuilding elements can sometimes hamper immersion, but Kianthe and Reyna’s relationship, along with Thorne’s frank and sensitive depictions of anxiety, lends a grounding depth and richness. Readers of Travis Baldree and TJ Klune will feel right at home with this cozy sapphic romantasy.

    • Booklist

      March 15, 2024
      Can't Spell Treason without Tea might best be described by quoting the grandfather from cult classic The Princess Bride, since the book does contain "fighting, torture, revenge . . .monsters, chases, escapes, true love, miracles." Queen's guard Reyna and her girlfriend, Kianthe, a powerful mage and Arcandor from a neighboring country, wish to flee the bonds and dangers of their roles to live quietly together. Can the couple evade Reyna's vindictive former employer, handle the dragons attacking their new home, mediate peace between the lords vying for control, and run the best tea and bookshop in the land? For all the tension and danger present in the narrative, the book does ultimately hold true to its promise of ""a cozy fantasy steeped with love."" Far more of the book's focus is on the growing trust between a couple living together for the first time and how Reyna and Kianthe contribute to and benefit from their new community, the rural town of Tawney. Fans of retired adventurer Viv's relationship with Tandri from Travis Baldree's Legends & Lattes (2022) should take a look.

      COPYRIGHT(2024) Booklist, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

    • Kirkus

      May 1, 2024
      A disillusioned palace guard and a powerful mage ditch the Queendom in this quaint Sapphic romantasy. Undying loyalty to a sociopathic queen can get pretty old. For Reyna, a palace guard, the final straw comes when a potential assassin holds a knife to her throat and she finds that Queen Tilaine doesn't care whether she lives or dies. Decades of fealty collapse in an instant, and truthfully...Reyna doesn't care either. She's finally free to escape the palace grounds and never look back, to travel to the ends of the earth and open a tea shop/bookstore. Reyna and her girlfriend, Kianthe, have dreamed of combining their favorite pastimes into a solid income and living a life free from royal obligation and bloodshed. But Reyna isn't the only half of the couple who will need to escape Tilaine--Kianthe is the Arcandor, the Mage of Ages. Kianthe wants no part of the Queendom, nor any role in the Magicary; she'd rather act on her own to decide what duty she owes the world's magic. Reyna and Kianthe flee the Queendom in the night and arrive just south of dragon country in a backwoods town named Tawney, meeting charming locals and uncovering an abandoned barn perfect for their tea- and bookshop. As Reyna and Kianthe embrace their independence, they tackle threats of dragons, Queen Tilaine's spies, and commands from the ancient Stone of Seeing, all while openly and patiently navigating their newly public relationship. Thorne's novel encompasses all the wonders of fantasy--pet griffons, vengeful dragons, and a bloodthirsty monarch--while capturing the heartwarming moments of a blossoming romance. Side characters, including a nonbinary diarn crushing on a young lord, add to the whimsy as Thorne deftly weaves a closed-door, cozy romantasy. A sweet fantasy brews little conflict.

      COPYRIGHT(2024) Kirkus Reviews, ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.

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